oh man the best is when a dude is like "you’re not wife material." fucking good. i want to be totalitarian dictator material; blood sucking life ruiner material; fucking bulletproof immortal drug lord material. not your fucking wife you gross asshole. 


i just almost missed my train because i was taking a personality quiz to find out what fruit I am


me in high school: omg cant wait for college
me in college: omg cant wait for the 10 years between retirement and the cold embrace of the grave


even when im not laying facedown on the floor literally, i am always laying facedown on the floor figuratively. in my heart or whatever.


Tumblr has given me a perfect sense of humour that’s shared by nobody at school

Squad means family. Squad means no one gets left behind or forgotten  


smashmouth was right… so much to do, so much to see



it’s so sad when you crave someone you can’t have

I thought this said carve I was very scared


whats the meaning of life? son, its those little tiny pumpkins. the ones that are mad small.  you know the ones i mean. 


well well well. if it isn’t my old friend, the dawning realization that i fucked up real bad